I Too Had A Love Story
By Dee Kay
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I read her name on Facebook profile, one last time. I went through all of her photographs, one after the other, admiring her beautiful smile. Feeling happy to realize that in some of those photographs, I was the reason behind that smile. I was in love with her even when that love is the reason behind so much pain that I have been feeling lately. Those big brown eyes covered by her glasses were still able to see through my soul even in those photographs. I scroll down to read our old conversation, all the way from the first time to the last time. So much has changed in mere 5 years of us knowing each other. I smiled as I read how awkwardly we were having our first conversation. The way I was trying to be all, formal and she was just the opposite of me. Then we exchanged numbers and destiny played its worst prank.
I was looking at the posts she shared with me on Facebook. The memes, the sentimental status, and the way she demanded my poems, which she loved more than anything about me. She would often force me to write for her. She would demand me to make her muse and create something worth it. It used to amuse me how whenever I thought about her, my words would just flow as if the universe knew what my soul and heart longed for yet in the end I always failed to justify what I really felt for her. It’s crazy how even a writer fails to justify his feelings and emotions.
I looked at the clock and it was around 8 o’clock. I still had around an hour left before I had to reach the venue. So I decided to pen out my final muse for her. I sat on my table in my new house, lonely and in pain as I began to write.
“We met as if destiny made its perfect move,
although our souls mingled but the world didn’t approve.
You were a fragile soul when you began to talk,
I was no better, yet I was strong enough be by your side as we walk.
You told me about your past ordeal and how your soul was broken,
I looked into your eyes and I don’t why but something inside me was awoken.
I saw myself in your eyes as they reflected a part of my story,
You looked at me, peacefully as you thought there was nothing to worry.
You had no clue that I was falling, and falling faster than I wanted to,
I was in a free fall waiting for your response but you had no clue.
Then I confessed my feelings and you panicked as you were afraid,
I was hurt but losing you over this seems like a bad trade.
I put on a brave face and we carried on our journey as friends,
Little did I knew that you too would fall for me towards the end.
We finally were on the same page as we were in love and it was magical,
Until the reality seep in and world seems so cynical.
Before we could dream of being together we knew the end,
we both accepted it even though we tried the rules to be bend.
You moved away so did I ask we had no chance of our forever,
I knew you cried too even when that’s something I wished on you, never.
I hope you stay happy even if that means staying away from you,
You and me had a love story that happened to the chosen few.
We met and that was what destiny had planned for us in his life story,
Even if faith didn’t end up good but our love had it’s glory.
– Aar Kay”
As I finally rested my pen a tear drop fell on my initials on the paper. The ink blended immediately with the link as if it knew the price I have to pay for love. I wanted to wipe it clean but then the thought of her touching my name in end, stopped me. If not me then at least something that belonged to me would be able to touch her one last time. I closed the letter in an envelope and kept it on the table as I went to get ready. The letter rested there while I began to get dressed for something that felt much more difficult than I originally imagined.
I got dressed and then I walked towards the table. I don’t know what got into me but that 10 seconds walk to the table felt like eternity to me. I could hear my own breathing, my heart pounding in my chest as if its going to explode, and tears tinkering down my face. With each step as I went close to the table I felt an unbearable sense of pain and this time it wasn’t just metaphorical pain but a physical pain. My sight was blurry as the tears rolled down non stop and finally I managed to reach the table. I looked at her Facebook profile one last time and then I blocked her. I grabbed the letter and walked out of the house.
I sat in the cab and the whole ride felt like I was reaching out to the sun and burning myself to ashes as I get closer and closer. I could see flashbacks after flashbacks of how I just talked to her and pretended to be all-practical yet this was killing me. The way I use to get angry on her because I was a sensitive person while she was like a bullet, straightforward. I knew I didn’t treat her right, at times but this isn’t what I deserve. Or WHAT WE DESERVE. Just then, I realize that I have reached the venue.
THE VENUE TO HER WEDDING.
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(Featured Image Courtesy – https://www.pexels.com/photo/broken-heart-love-sad-14303/)